Posted in Emotions


“Beware of perpetrators in disguise… Some people set fires wherever they go, and have mastered the art of playing the burn victim.” –Steve Maraboli

I think everyone is a victim in certain circumstances, but some people seem to play the victim. It’s something you just believe until you get to know them better and see that they are the problem.  You just have to look at both sides.

The main determinate is perception.  Maybe, there are motives and past events that are not taken into account.  If you hear a story about a man punching another man, you assume the guy that got punched is the victim.  However, the guy that got punched could have been verbally harassing and threatening the guy that punched him which makes the role of victim be reversed.

It’s a tricky subject because you probably will only ever hear the one side.  You can’t really know all the facts unless you were there.  I’ve seen certain people use this to their advantage and play the victim over and over tricking countless other people.  They never even see it coming.  I know I didn’t in certain circumstances.

A common place you see this is when people talk about their past relationships.  They will tell you all kinds of horrible things their ex did to them, but they won’t ever tell you that they were cheating on them.  So you feel bad for them and give them sympathy the they are the “victim” after all.  Then, at some point maybe you date them and they cheat on you, and you realize it was all an act to draw you in.  Another example is guys that claim they are nice guys and complain about never getting the girl.   These guys are usually not the nice guy.  They play the victim to lure people in, and boy, you seem like the fool when you realize the truth.  A similar example is when people complain about always being friend zoned, but fail to mention how they friend zone everyone who doesn’t look like a model.

“Abandon the idea that you will forever be the victim of the things that have happened to you. Choose to be a victor.” ― Seth Adam Smith

Not as many people play the victim as actually are.  The world is a scary place, and lots of terrible things happen to people.  It is completely beyond their control, and they are victims.  Even after everything is over, sometimes you’re stuck in that mindset as a victim.  You never really move past it.

Many people aren’t pretending to be a victim though.  They really feel like they are.  I feel that way sometimes, and I know others do as well.  Sometimes the things that happen to us can’t be helped.  It’s not our fault, but we can’t let it consume us.  We can’t let the things that happen to us define who we are and reflect on the rest of our lives.

If you act like a victim, it seems that you are treated like a victim.  Not just people feeling sorry for you, but also, more bad things seem to happen to make you more of a victim.  At least that’s the way I think.  People see weakness, and they take advantage of that over and over to hurt you more.  You can’t let just anyone in to see your weaknesses and your pain.

You have to see the flip side of being a victim.  Even though bad things happened to you, you made it through and are a survivor.  That is something to be proud of.

-Love, Dee



I'm a college student from a rural state in the USA. I'm just doing my best in life. I love to read and will probably mention books that are inspiring me frequently. Oh and in case you couldn't tell, I am obsessed with flamingos. -Dee

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